I shamelessly stole this from RuPaul's weblog

Things you can only say at Thanksgiving:

1. Talk about a huge breast!
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. How long do I beat it before it's ready?
4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
5. Whew, that was one terrific spread!
6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
8. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?
9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!
10. Don't play with your meat.
11. Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.
12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
13. I didn't expect everyone to come at once!
14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
15. How long will it take after you stick it in?
16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
17. Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!
18. That's the biggest one I've ever seen!

I barely talked at all during dance warm ups and very little during practice but to ask where my hands should be, if I'm turning at the same time as everyone else, etc. Del asked if I was ok during warm ups since I was so quiet. I nodded, plastered on a fake smile and said yes.

Sitting there, stretching for all I'm worth and listening to Del, Beth and Sue bitch about how they ate something they knew they shouldn't eat and now their joints ache, they got a zit, their nails broke, they got a headache or whatever because they consumed food they knew wasn't good for them.

I'm think, 'gee, I was minding my own business and developed dysplasia.' Excuse the fuck out of me for being quiet and patiently trying to deal with your self centered, woe is me, should have known better but did it anyway and now I'm suffering attitude and trying desperatly not to walk over and punch you a good one square between the eyes.

I finally got in to see the dr. Because of the rescheduling I got a $20 credit toward what I owed on the biopsy so I only had to write a check for $7.50.

I had my cervix looked at through a microscope. She saw some dysplasia and took a biopsy. When those results come back, then she'll determine what kind of treatment I'll have, if any. The biopsy wasn't that painful. I cramped up at bit during but not afterward. I took a pair of aleve an hour before so I was fine. The aleve wore off about 6.30 or so and I felt some soreness, but no bleeding which the dr said was good.

Lab results will be back in 10 to 14 days.

Oh, yeah, and I got laid last weekend, for the first time in over a year. Three times in 12 hrs and Rex, having just turned 40 did better than the late twentysomethings I've had.

Well, I was supposed to have my biopsy Tuesday but when I check in, she says Dr. D just scrubbed in for delivery and did I want to be rescheduled.

In a voice a bit louder than necessary, I told her that this would be my third rescheduleing this month for the procedure and that I wanted to be seen this week. She takes a long hard look at the schedule and says Dr. D should not be having any deliveries on Friday. Yeah, right. Of course the last time it was my decision to move back the appt a week, but she didn't need to know that. I just want this damn thing over with.

~*~

A guy I'm not really attracted to and reguard as a friend emailed me this afternoon asking if I found him physically attractive. Well, let's see, he's built like my brother, looks like him a bit, and has the same first name as my dad. It's a bit incestous. I find him as physically attractive as a bowl of overcooked brussel sprouts with a big dollup of rancid mayo on the top.

Now, how do I polietly tell him this?

I was supposed to have my biopsy yesterday but surfing the crimson wave kinda put me out of the mood for that so I called and had it moved back to next Tuesday.

Mom was diagnosed as diabetic two weeks ago and had surgery last week. It was outpatient to put a tube in her bladder to help it drain as she's been having kidney problems lately. But she never told me when I went home the weekend before. Dad told Cameron so he called her that afternoon, but she never called me until I got off work. Said she didn't want me to worry and apologized for it. I told her not to worry about it. I haven't told her I'm getting a biopsy of my cervix for the same reason. If the test comes back fine I probably won't tell her about it, but if something is found I'll say something.

Mom had surgery again today. She has kidney stones and this morning went into outpatient to have them broken up. I'm not sure what it's called but they put her on a big bag of water and using sound waves or something broke them up. It was non-invasive and left her bruised bad but otherwise she's feeling pretty good.

If you like northern lights and the prairie as much as I do, check out Prairie Journal. My favorites are the pics of the prairie. A few were posted over the summer that brought tears to my eyes. The prairie, for me, holds a boundless and simple beauty that no words can describe.

I want a dot.com. I've only thought of a few cool names but they seem to be taken. Bummer. Don't think I can afford one right now.

I think when my parents ask me, I'll ask for a tv for Christmas. Seventeen or 19", a bit bigger than my current 13" tv which is on the blink right now.

Had planned on going to see Rex tomorrow since it's his 40th birthday tomorrow. I planned on going up around noon, after his son's morning football game. But Rex just called and said his son has a game at 10a and 2p. Then when he comes home, he'll have at least one, if not all of his kids with him and possibly his parents and a sister or two. That was too much for me to handle and so I told him I'd see him later. He knows I'm not ready to meet his kids so he didn't pressure me or give me a hard time about it.

He goes out to Los Angles Tuesday for a business deal. He's selling air time on his tv station to some guy and goes out there to finalize the contract, etc. He flies home Thursday night, landing around 10p. I told him he's welcome to stay that night with me since it's just over a 2 hour drive from the airport to his house.

My biopsy was rescheduled for Nov 12, but I called and had it rescheduled, yet again, since I'd be in the middle of my period then. So I go back Nov 19th now.

I took my car in for it's first oil change and an alignment check since I hit a pot hole and it has been pulling ever since. I dropped it off Wednesday at 12.30. On the phone the guy gives me the impression they have thier own shuttle service to take people back to work, or home and pick them up when thier car is ready so when he asked if he could arrange a ride for me, I said sure.

Well, the ride was actually a taxi. A taxi I had to wait for 45 minutes to show up. So I was an hour late getting back to work. The voucher was for $10 and the fare came to $9.60.

Had a co-worker take me back to the dealership. I was told my car would be ready by the time I came back. I walk in and he said they were finishing up. I had a seat, watched the news and watched as bay doors closed, lights were turned off and offices locked. The service guy would come through occassionally telling me they were still working on it. Finally he calls me into his office. My car is fine, however the alignment machine is not working properly. I had to leave it overnight and he put me into a used 99 Altima from the lot. He told me it would be ready today. Well, at 2p this afternoon I called to see how things were going, he said someone came out to look at the machine and it needed a part. The car would have to stay another night. I told him I was going to need gas money if I kept the loaner. He offered to put me in a nice rental. Sounded good, since I'm not paying for it.

Then a few hours later, he called to say that a part was found and my car is fixed and ready to be picked up. When I did pick it up he said he owed me a car wash since their detail man left to finish school and they had yet to replace him. First thing I look for when I open the door is grease on the seat. The seat was fine, however it looked like someone walked through an oil slick and got in my car. I've never seen such grease marks on floor mats in my life. So I went back in and told him of the grease and handed him the key. About 10 minutes later he came back and my mats were clean.

You'd think they'd put down cardboard mats or plastic or something.

And if you're voting today. Go Vote!

I accidently left my bra at Rex's over the weekend. I didn't miss it until yesterday when I get an email from him saying I had left it there and he found it and fondled it before going to work that morning. I'm thankful I didn't leave my panties behind. He probably would have called in to work and stayed in bed all day sniffing them.

I went for my biopsy and after a bit was called to the desk. It seems my doctor was off somewhere delivering a baby and all her non pregnant patients were rescheduled. Her pregnant patients were shuffled around to different doctors and seen as soon as possible.

So I go back the 12th...barring any other babies that decide to make their appearance around 11.30.