I shamelessly stole this from RuPaul's weblog

Things you can only say at Thanksgiving:

1. Talk about a huge breast!
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. How long do I beat it before it's ready?
4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
5. Whew, that was one terrific spread!
6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
8. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?
9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!
10. Don't play with your meat.
11. Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.
12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
13. I didn't expect everyone to come at once!
14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
15. How long will it take after you stick it in?
16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
17. Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!
18. That's the biggest one I've ever seen!

I barely talked at all during dance warm ups and very little during practice but to ask where my hands should be, if I'm turning at the same time as everyone else, etc. Del asked if I was ok during warm ups since I was so quiet. I nodded, plastered on a fake smile and said yes.

Sitting there, stretching for all I'm worth and listening to Del, Beth and Sue bitch about how they ate something they knew they shouldn't eat and now their joints ache, they got a zit, their nails broke, they got a headache or whatever because they consumed food they knew wasn't good for them.

I'm think, 'gee, I was minding my own business and developed dysplasia.' Excuse the fuck out of me for being quiet and patiently trying to deal with your self centered, woe is me, should have known better but did it anyway and now I'm suffering attitude and trying desperatly not to walk over and punch you a good one square between the eyes.

I finally got in to see the dr. Because of the rescheduling I got a $20 credit toward what I owed on the biopsy so I only had to write a check for $7.50.

I had my cervix looked at through a microscope. She saw some dysplasia and took a biopsy. When those results come back, then she'll determine what kind of treatment I'll have, if any. The biopsy wasn't that painful. I cramped up at bit during but not afterward. I took a pair of aleve an hour before so I was fine. The aleve wore off about 6.30 or so and I felt some soreness, but no bleeding which the dr said was good.

Lab results will be back in 10 to 14 days.

Oh, yeah, and I got laid last weekend, for the first time in over a year. Three times in 12 hrs and Rex, having just turned 40 did better than the late twentysomethings I've had.

Well, I was supposed to have my biopsy Tuesday but when I check in, she says Dr. D just scrubbed in for delivery and did I want to be rescheduled.

In a voice a bit louder than necessary, I told her that this would be my third rescheduleing this month for the procedure and that I wanted to be seen this week. She takes a long hard look at the schedule and says Dr. D should not be having any deliveries on Friday. Yeah, right. Of course the last time it was my decision to move back the appt a week, but she didn't need to know that. I just want this damn thing over with.

~*~

A guy I'm not really attracted to and reguard as a friend emailed me this afternoon asking if I found him physically attractive. Well, let's see, he's built like my brother, looks like him a bit, and has the same first name as my dad. It's a bit incestous. I find him as physically attractive as a bowl of overcooked brussel sprouts with a big dollup of rancid mayo on the top.

Now, how do I polietly tell him this?